Thursday, December 22, 2005
What a Mess!!!
My 9 year old daughter can be a slob. To say she gets it from her mother would be true, but not helpful.
Her room has always contained countless boxes and bags of items no one else would value. She likes: leaves of various shapes/textures, interesting rocks, feathers, scraps of fabric, torn paper, pieces of broken toys, anything that reminds her of something fun, or is a lovely color, or feels interesting… An exhaustive list would be impossible. She also likes stuff other 9 year olds like - stuffed toys, craft supplies, photos, music CDs…
Additionally, she is not terribly interested in liner tasks. Chores like putting away her clothes, spelling, or cleaning up after a craft, are tedious for her (and the rest of us). I’ve reminded, and reminded… oh who am I kidding? I’ve turned to nagging.
I’ve tried to help numerous times by going into her room when she was not home and cleaning it out. I have disposed of trash bags of stuff I define as trash. I’ve discreetly returned many rocks to the great outdoors. I’ve labled bins for her clothing, and shelves for her toys. I’ve created a place for everything I think she needs. The times, I’ve gone in (in combat gear) and imposed order, I thought she’d enjoy it! Appreciate it! I thought she’d say, “If I’d known how nice this would be, I would have done this long ago!” This did not happen.
Tuesday, the right motivator presented herself. Selena, another 3rd grader in Morgan’s girl scout troop, wanted to come for a sleep-over. I consented to this plan with the condition being a clean room to entertain in. She thought this was unreasonable, but I'm the mom... Without homework, school, and other tedium in the way, she dove in. She identified and removed 3 trash bags full of trash!!! She sorted through her clothes and bagged ones she can no longer wear. She organized her art supplies. In two days (+/- 10 hours all together) she had it clean and organized. (OK, I helped quite a bit, but she was doing the job.)
Before Selena arrived, Morgan was in her room, with the door closed, enjoying the serenity. She was playing beautiful music and doing some sketching. This time, she got it.
Early this morning, the children were sleeping. It was dark and quiet.
I read, “let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water…”
I thought about creating an environment in which I can find peace and serenity. A sincere heart that draws near to God. A clean conscience. Getting there often takes some effort - like getting up early. But it’s worth it. It provides real rest. I can lay in the floor, listening to beautiful music and do a little sketching... ¶ 3:24 AM
Her room has always contained countless boxes and bags of items no one else would value. She likes: leaves of various shapes/textures, interesting rocks, feathers, scraps of fabric, torn paper, pieces of broken toys, anything that reminds her of something fun, or is a lovely color, or feels interesting… An exhaustive list would be impossible. She also likes stuff other 9 year olds like - stuffed toys, craft supplies, photos, music CDs…
Additionally, she is not terribly interested in liner tasks. Chores like putting away her clothes, spelling, or cleaning up after a craft, are tedious for her (and the rest of us). I’ve reminded, and reminded… oh who am I kidding? I’ve turned to nagging.
I’ve tried to help numerous times by going into her room when she was not home and cleaning it out. I have disposed of trash bags of stuff I define as trash. I’ve discreetly returned many rocks to the great outdoors. I’ve labled bins for her clothing, and shelves for her toys. I’ve created a place for everything I think she needs. The times, I’ve gone in (in combat gear) and imposed order, I thought she’d enjoy it! Appreciate it! I thought she’d say, “If I’d known how nice this would be, I would have done this long ago!” This did not happen.
Tuesday, the right motivator presented herself. Selena, another 3rd grader in Morgan’s girl scout troop, wanted to come for a sleep-over. I consented to this plan with the condition being a clean room to entertain in. She thought this was unreasonable, but I'm the mom... Without homework, school, and other tedium in the way, she dove in. She identified and removed 3 trash bags full of trash!!! She sorted through her clothes and bagged ones she can no longer wear. She organized her art supplies. In two days (+/- 10 hours all together) she had it clean and organized. (OK, I helped quite a bit, but she was doing the job.)
Before Selena arrived, Morgan was in her room, with the door closed, enjoying the serenity. She was playing beautiful music and doing some sketching. This time, she got it.
Early this morning, the children were sleeping. It was dark and quiet.
I read, “let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water…”
I thought about creating an environment in which I can find peace and serenity. A sincere heart that draws near to God. A clean conscience. Getting there often takes some effort - like getting up early. But it’s worth it. It provides real rest. I can lay in the floor, listening to beautiful music and do a little sketching... ¶ 3:24 AM
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SO familiar! I couldn't have written all that myself. Except the part about her "getting it", which hasn't happened yet. I've finally decided to let it go (a huge step for me). But the spiritual analogy is so beautiful, and so true! I guess I have a messy room, too.
I'm so glad you found a clutter-free envirnoment in which you could 'draw near to God'!
Are you still enjoying the rest, or has life been battering at you?
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Are you still enjoying the rest, or has life been battering at you?
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